- It's expensive and time consuming!
- The court process for custody is costly and it can take a long time. Unless parents can work out an agreement along the way, they can expect an education session, a mediation session, a conciliation or two with court personnel, a conciliation or two with a judge, trial preparation and then trial. There is also a potential for costly psychological evaluations, home studies and much more. For each of these steps, both parties will have to take time away from work and their families. It is advisable to have legal counsel for most of these steps. And, as you can imagine, the legal costs will mount.
- It is damaging to families and ongoing relationships!
- Face it, no matter how you feel about your children's other parent, you are not getting rid of him or her. You will have years of birthdays, weddings, and grandchildren. Having a workable relationship throughout your children's lives is invaluable. If you choose to battle it out in court, the damage can be irreparable. Tensions and mistrust are sky high. That is no way to start your co-parenting relationship.
- No one will like the outcome!
- Though our judges are very capable, a judge just doesn't know your family, doesn't fully understand your schedules or the specifics of your lives. How can he or she make decisions about your day-to-day life better than the two of you? Invariably, nobody likes the outcome when it is left to the hands of a judge. Two parents (and their attorneys) are in a much better position to sit down and work out a schedule that best fits the family dynamics.
While not every co-parenting relationship will allow for the parents to work together to come to a workable outcome, the vast majority of them can. If you are interested in keeping your costs down, not spending countless hours in the Family Division building, maintaining an amicable co-parenting relationship, and getting to a resolution that makes sense, hire an attorney willing to work toward these goals. There are many of us out there interested in your family's future.
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About the Author
Amanda C. Cook
Amanda C. Cook focuses her practice on family law — divorce, support, child custody, and the division of assets and debts. She is an experienced collaborative law attorney and mediator, and has practiced with the firm since 2005.
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